Push or Protect?

I've been having a serious internal battle all week. It's driving me insane! My biggest priority is to be a good mom. So what I have been facing is the question of wether a good mom pushes or protects her child.

This has all come about with Riley's first day of school looming on the calendar for tomorrow. It has always been my plan to put her in the wonderful PPCD program and take advantage of that amazing resource. But as it gets closer, the knot in my stomach gets larger and my nausea increases. Should I push Riley into school where she will learn and grow and make important strides in her life with wonderful people helping her along the way? Or should I keep her home and protect her from the big scary world out there? This is so much more of a difficult question then others might think.

After a mind numbing amount of prayers, pondering and pandering for everyone's opinion, I have decidedly packed Riley's back pack and laid out her first day of school clothes. My baby will start school tomorrow.

I came to this decision because I have the hope that I can BOTH push AND protect her at the same time. I am confident that I can help her find her own level of success at school while at the same time being very involved and informed with all that is happening and that she is experiencing at school.

For now this battle is decided. But then why don't I feel better? I'm just so nervous for my baby, and to be honest for myself. It all begins tomorrow! Wish us both good luck!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone